2 Nephi 4
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OK- sad news. Well, maybe not sad, sad, but I was bummed. In doing further research, I'm not actually blood related to LeGrand Richards. My fourth great great-aunt's husband's sister is his mother (did you get that, lol) We are related by marriage- but for the life of my, I can't tell you how. Second cousin four times removed, or something like that. Maybe Kristine can tell me :)
Anyway- onto the reading for today!
I also get a little sad when I read of Lehi's passing. How sad it must have been for them. Lehi was the glue that kept the family together. He was the patriarch, able and willing to bestow upon them blessings and promises before he died.
And now, Nephi is left as the patriarch- even though he is not the oldest. Obviously, that didn't sit well with Laman.
I love this chapter. It humanizes Nephi. He had faith, but he also struggled with temptations and self-doubt. What a tormented man! I know how he feels. I have faith. I love the scriptures and the things of God. I love to teach, to learn, and to testify. But, oh, how I struggle with temptations and doubt. I so want to be good, to be better. And yet, I am not. Even last night I argued with my son- something I do not like to do. But I let pride and impatience get the best of me, and I was unfair and unkind.
O wretched woman that I am! I felt so bad!
So, when I read Nephi's words, I feel connected with him. We read all the wonderful things about him, but it is obvious here that he had his own struggles, that he have into his pride and/or temptations now and again.
Some people have very serious sins they are dealing with. How wretched they must feel at times! But, the same hope and the same joy that Nephi felt can be felt by them.
Nephi knew to not wallow in the waste of self-pity. He said, "I know in whom I have trusted." (15) His testimony of and faith in God transcended his mortal weaknesses.
He knew God was with him, helping him, loving him, forgiving him, protecting him, hearing him, speaking to him, teaching him and showing him the miracle of the Savior's life and Atonement.
Those things brought Nephi such great motivation and strength. "Awake my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart..."
I look at the list above, and though I have not seen visions, God communicates to me in the way that I need it. He has given me everything He gave Nephi. Then, why should I be any less quick to awaken my soul and rejoice?
Why should I be content wallowing in what a poor mother I have been at times, or dwell on the stupid stuff I say, or the promptings I've missed, or the sins I've committed?
I shouldn't be.
And I'm not.
Isn't the power of perspective amazing?! When you focus on yourself and all you cannot do, it is so easy to be weighed down by the muddy coat of sin and mortality.
But, when you focus on the Lord, you see just how easy it is to remove that coat and be freed from it. You cannot help but feel joy!
Verse 34 Nephi speaks of the trust he has in God. To be able to say, "I am so not perfect, but I am loved, and I will overcome with your help," is a triumph in and of yourself. To not allow yourself to be weighed down by self-criticism, self-doubt,the fear and self-punishment is a difficult task indeed. That is where the adversary wants us to be- right there in the mud with him- dirty and miserable and feeling awful about it.
I much prefer Nephi's approach. Don't you?
OK- sad news. Well, maybe not sad, sad, but I was bummed. In doing further research, I'm not actually blood related to LeGrand Richards. My fourth great great-aunt's husband's sister is his mother (did you get that, lol) We are related by marriage- but for the life of my, I can't tell you how. Second cousin four times removed, or something like that. Maybe Kristine can tell me :)
Anyway- onto the reading for today!
I also get a little sad when I read of Lehi's passing. How sad it must have been for them. Lehi was the glue that kept the family together. He was the patriarch, able and willing to bestow upon them blessings and promises before he died.
And now, Nephi is left as the patriarch- even though he is not the oldest. Obviously, that didn't sit well with Laman.
I love this chapter. It humanizes Nephi. He had faith, but he also struggled with temptations and self-doubt. What a tormented man! I know how he feels. I have faith. I love the scriptures and the things of God. I love to teach, to learn, and to testify. But, oh, how I struggle with temptations and doubt. I so want to be good, to be better. And yet, I am not. Even last night I argued with my son- something I do not like to do. But I let pride and impatience get the best of me, and I was unfair and unkind.
O wretched woman that I am! I felt so bad!
So, when I read Nephi's words, I feel connected with him. We read all the wonderful things about him, but it is obvious here that he had his own struggles, that he have into his pride and/or temptations now and again.
Some people have very serious sins they are dealing with. How wretched they must feel at times! But, the same hope and the same joy that Nephi felt can be felt by them.
Nephi knew to not wallow in the waste of self-pity. He said, "I know in whom I have trusted." (15) His testimony of and faith in God transcended his mortal weaknesses.
He knew God was with him, helping him, loving him, forgiving him, protecting him, hearing him, speaking to him, teaching him and showing him the miracle of the Savior's life and Atonement.
Those things brought Nephi such great motivation and strength. "Awake my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart..."
I look at the list above, and though I have not seen visions, God communicates to me in the way that I need it. He has given me everything He gave Nephi. Then, why should I be any less quick to awaken my soul and rejoice?
Why should I be content wallowing in what a poor mother I have been at times, or dwell on the stupid stuff I say, or the promptings I've missed, or the sins I've committed?
I shouldn't be.
And I'm not.
Isn't the power of perspective amazing?! When you focus on yourself and all you cannot do, it is so easy to be weighed down by the muddy coat of sin and mortality.
But, when you focus on the Lord, you see just how easy it is to remove that coat and be freed from it. You cannot help but feel joy!
Verse 34 Nephi speaks of the trust he has in God. To be able to say, "I am so not perfect, but I am loved, and I will overcome with your help," is a triumph in and of yourself. To not allow yourself to be weighed down by self-criticism, self-doubt,the fear and self-punishment is a difficult task indeed. That is where the adversary wants us to be- right there in the mud with him- dirty and miserable and feeling awful about it.
I much prefer Nephi's approach. Don't you?
This chapter is in my top 3 of the Book of Mormon. I am so grateful that Nephi shows his humanness to us....and then pulls up his bootstraps and rejoiceess. This chapter gives me personal hope in my salvation. This is the joy of the gospel for me!
ReplyDeleteAs for you famous relative, I would use FH program with relationship calculator. you have one with legacy. let us know.
I always find it interesting to hear the women's perspective on their sins. Frequently I hear "I wasn't patient, I've not been a good mother, I lost my temper." I hear this and think, man, women are angels.
ReplyDeleteI read Nephi's psalm and he's saying, "O wretched man that I am. I am encompassed about because of the temptations and sins that do so easily beset me." I get a sense in comparing the two that women are on a higher plane.
I relate to Nephi and sorrow that my mind is so carnal, sensual, and devilish. I don't even have time to feel guilt over being impatient. Are you kidding me? That's not even a top 5 worry for me. I'm not even close to there yet.
To be honest, I get more depressed when I read this chapter and then hear women's reactions to it because I realize that my chances of ever become pure without spot are very slim.
So here am I, being the irreverent one. Again. Or as some of those reading with us this year will find... often.
ReplyDeleteI read about Lehi blessing his grandchildren and then dying. Sobering.
Then I got to the Nephi lamentation part and (being as I think in cartoons) started "reverently" giggling a little. Not because I am without sin... yes, I have yelled at my kids, snarled at my husband, been impatient and less than polite to others at times. I have beaten myself up and then had to repent for being so hard on myself, which is always harder than others are with me. I have been in that valley of sorrow and I have been weak. I have let other's actions get into my heart and bring me down. Anyways... Nephi's lamentation.
Starting in about verse 26. I was reading and start thinking about the Road Runner and the Coyote. Oh, I am sure you can hear it now. Valley of Sorrow. Cactus and sand. Afflictions and weakness. Rocks. Enemies.
The Roadrunner being the good guy.... always delivered from the brink of death at the hands of the coyote. The gates of hell shut were before him, cause really- he was just a happy guy out doing what the Lord made him to do. His escape was always made sure. His path was straight. The stumbling blocks were definitely put in front of his enemy but his path was clear. His way was not hedged up but the coyote's sure was.
Anvils. Bombs. Falling off cliffs. Traps springing too late to catch the bird and smacking the coyote in the face. More explosives. You name it... the bird was always saved and the coyote doomed. But did the bird lash out and whine and cry because the coyote was always been mean to him? No. He smiled as best as a bird can, beep-beeped, and kept on doing what the Lord intended him to do.
Not a conventional way to look at this chapter, I know. But for me... I'd really rather be like the road runner. In a good way.